Damn blogger blocked in office again... Crap! I don't understand the thought process of the CCD or whoever is responsible for this blocking shit. I mean, they block all web-based email sites (gmail, rediffmail etc), orkut (a community site) and blogger, but they don't block ICICIDirect. Hell, my roommates, half the folks in CCD, three-quarters of SEs and ALL DMs/GPMs/SPMsPMs/PAs in Infy are sitting on that site for 26 out of 24 hours. So basically blogging and external email is un-productive, while ICICI Direct is not??? Yeah right...
Dad had the operation done today. The blood sugar level is fine. He's blind till tomorrow morning now. Once they remove the dressing, he's still supposed to be staying away from reading or anything of that sort for a couple of months.
My roommate Ralph has this uncanny habit of sleeping in a sitting position. I mean, I see him going to sleep, lying down on the bed. But middle of the night, I am usually woken up because of my wheezing problem, I see him sitting on one corner of the bed, his head drooping on his chest, drooling into a puddle of saliva all over his vest... Trust me, waking up at an unearthly hour and being greeted by this scenario is not exactly comforting!
I doze off sitting too, but that usually happens when I'm working, or when I'm listening to one of Mummy's tirades on my perfect eating habits or endless lectures on the importance of church, and why we should attend church regularly etc etc.
No I'm not an atheist. But in my eyes, the church is nothing but a weekly meeting place of hypocrites who have nothing better to do with their Sundays. I think "Angels and Demons" put this forward pretty aptly as "a bunch of old farts getting together under a chief old fart"... These were not the exact words, but well, something to that effect!
I did enjoy going to the chapel, back in school, though... A quiet, serene place, devoid of noise, where I can sit, at peace, and talk to myself! Yeah, I love talking to myself too... I do it all the time too, much to the consternation of my roomies! Ralph still gets startled when I do that! You are at the hospital, your wife is in labour, the doctor comes out and declares "TWINS", you shake his hand and run inside, you see the kids, one negro and the other Chinese, imagine the expression on your face. Ralph usually has the exact same one when I set off on the irrelevant-talking-to-myself tangent... PRICELESS!
Looking back at the past few months of my life, seems relations (of all kinds) never work for me... Maybe not just past months, this has just always been my story... Relations usually turn into a bottomless cistern of attachment, heartburn and misery in the long run, atleast for me. Constant fights, arguments, ego-clashes are making me turn away from people, I truly care for, and causing me to recede more and more into myself... Loneliness is one serene yet empty feeling... The problem is when you care for people, excessive attachment causes pain to everyone involved and, most of all, to me... Clinging to the people I care for scares the shit out of me... Maybe because I fear losing it... Some people spend their lives searching for what they want. Some people spend their lives searching for what it is that they want. I just sincerely want to live each day; don't even want to search because I feel I just do not want anything...
People say I shouldn't live each day so scared of my past... They say I'll never change what's been and gone
Never change what's been and gone
My destiny wil keep me warm
The stars in my eyes are fading away
Maybe I will see them again someday
Need to take a look at the world around and about
Instead of crying my heart out
Need to take a moment to smell the Wild, Wild Rose
Instead of halting on the paths that I chose
Current Mood: Introspective
Jukebox: This is how you remind me - Nickelback
Dad had the operation done today. The blood sugar level is fine. He's blind till tomorrow morning now. Once they remove the dressing, he's still supposed to be staying away from reading or anything of that sort for a couple of months.
My roommate Ralph has this uncanny habit of sleeping in a sitting position. I mean, I see him going to sleep, lying down on the bed. But middle of the night, I am usually woken up because of my wheezing problem, I see him sitting on one corner of the bed, his head drooping on his chest, drooling into a puddle of saliva all over his vest... Trust me, waking up at an unearthly hour and being greeted by this scenario is not exactly comforting!
I doze off sitting too, but that usually happens when I'm working, or when I'm listening to one of Mummy's tirades on my perfect eating habits or endless lectures on the importance of church, and why we should attend church regularly etc etc.
No I'm not an atheist. But in my eyes, the church is nothing but a weekly meeting place of hypocrites who have nothing better to do with their Sundays. I think "Angels and Demons" put this forward pretty aptly as "a bunch of old farts getting together under a chief old fart"... These were not the exact words, but well, something to that effect!
I did enjoy going to the chapel, back in school, though... A quiet, serene place, devoid of noise, where I can sit, at peace, and talk to myself! Yeah, I love talking to myself too... I do it all the time too, much to the consternation of my roomies! Ralph still gets startled when I do that! You are at the hospital, your wife is in labour, the doctor comes out and declares "TWINS", you shake his hand and run inside, you see the kids, one negro and the other Chinese, imagine the expression on your face. Ralph usually has the exact same one when I set off on the irrelevant-talking-to-myself tangent... PRICELESS!
Looking back at the past few months of my life, seems relations (of all kinds) never work for me... Maybe not just past months, this has just always been my story... Relations usually turn into a bottomless cistern of attachment, heartburn and misery in the long run, atleast for me. Constant fights, arguments, ego-clashes are making me turn away from people, I truly care for, and causing me to recede more and more into myself... Loneliness is one serene yet empty feeling... The problem is when you care for people, excessive attachment causes pain to everyone involved and, most of all, to me... Clinging to the people I care for scares the shit out of me... Maybe because I fear losing it... Some people spend their lives searching for what they want. Some people spend their lives searching for what it is that they want. I just sincerely want to live each day; don't even want to search because I feel I just do not want anything...
People say I shouldn't live each day so scared of my past... They say I'll never change what's been and gone
Never change what's been and gone
My destiny wil keep me warm
The stars in my eyes are fading away
Maybe I will see them again someday
Need to take a look at the world around and about
Instead of crying my heart out
Need to take a moment to smell the Wild, Wild Rose
Instead of halting on the paths that I chose
Current Mood: Introspective
Jukebox: This is how you remind me - Nickelback
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